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9Honey – Celebrating Your Divorce

This article was published on 9Honey. You can find tit here

“I planned every moment meticulously”

Symbolism provided much comfort to Jemimah Ashleigh as she worked her way out of her short marriage.

“My partner and I were together for seven years before we got married. Looking back, I guess I got married because I felt like I should, but even though my ex is a good man, it just didn’t work. We split after 10 months of marriage and I had to sort through the pieces to work out how to start the next chapter.

“With our divorce there were pivotal dates to acknowledge, so I was keen to line up experiences to coincide with all the key moments. On the day of our wedding anniversary, I purchased a white dress and went to my favourite bar to have shots with friends at exactly the time of our ceremony. On the day I was actually able to apply for divorce, I booked a one-on-one boxing class, where I got my fight back, and then backed this up with a massage, a good cry and some time relaxing on the beach.

“When my divorce was granted I woke up early and went for a hike around the Mornington Peninsula followed by a soothing swim. Then I downloaded Tinder, purchased myself a cake he hated, wore my favourite dress and heels he disliked me wearing and video-called my friends (it was during lockdown, so I couldn’t see anyone in person) to drink, chat and laugh about things. It was probably at that moment I realised I’d fallen in love with life again.

“I think during tough times women need other women around them and I found ways to get my support circle together at a time that was challenging to see others socially. The fact that we’re celebrating, or at least taking time to acknowledge this key point in our lives, makes sense. People used to hide the fact that their marriages didn’t work, but today there’s no shame in saying no good marriage ever ended in divorce.”

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