I went to Noah Kahan’s concert in Melbourne this week.
Firstly, let me start by saying that Noah is one of my favourite singers and if you don’t know him – start with Stick Season.
My wonderful friend A* (not her real name) and I went to the concert all snuggled up with a picnic rug, food with a three hour wait at the Sidney Myer Music Bowl. Think: endless grass hills, cold weather and endless snacks.
We did what all good girlfriends do when you have that much time on your hands and talked about what was happening in our lives.
Around minute five the subject of boys came up.
Annelise (dammit, I said her real name) asked me about ‘How’s dating S* (not his real name either)?’
Me: ‘Yeah. We will see – it is very early days.’
Annelise paused and said ‘What are you looking for here? What do you want?’
This very simple question – ‘What do you want?’’ sent me into what can best be described as a brain melting moment as I laid looking at the sky and eating my tee vee snacks.
The truth is, I’ve been bumping into this question for weeks ever since I did my 2024 goal setting. I think Annelise and I laid in silence for about 5 minutes ‘Honestly mate, it’s a really good question.’
Annelise and I went on to talk about work, life and I would go onto eat another 400 tee vee snacks, the concert eventually begins with the most incredible and funny show I’ve seen in years. The second to last show was a song called Homesick which has always been one of my favourites.
I looked at the sunset of my home in Melbourne screaming these song lyrics and I burst into tears.
‘I got dreams but I can’t make myself believe them
Spend the rest of my life with what could have been…’
This was the answer to the question ‘What do you want.’ Because the truth is – I’ve got dreams but I can’t make myself believe them.
That is the hard truth. My dreams are big, and scary and I have no idea how the hell I am going to do them. I think about them constantly. They just seem genuinely impossible.
I continue to sob crying and singing to the rest of Homesick and realise for the first time I might really have acknowledge that these dreams are screaming at me.
The concert wraps up and we leave with 12,000 people and head back home.
I arrive home to my apartment on the 35th floor overlooking the skyline of Melbourne. Wasn’t the idea of this being my home even a few years ago, absolutely insane?
I’m a best-selling author. On what planet did that happen?
I run a disruptive coaching program. What kind of audacity allowed that?!
I shower, eat something with more nutritional value that tee vee snacks, and I sit on the balcony with Munro and my crippling self doubt – and actually let my mind wander.
If I had actually done all of this THIS, am I capable for MORE?
Afterall, this all once started as a dream and now it’s my every single day life.
So dear reader, instead of me leaving you with a big life lesson – I’m going to leave you with a question.
Do you have dreams that you are scared to acknowledge because they feel too big?
How do you make yourself believe them?
I’d love to her about what you are wanting to achieve in this next year. Also – can no one else ask me any other life changing questions this week? I can’t handle it. Also, does anyone have any moving boxes? I’ll need them in June. Enjoy rocking out to Noah Kahan.
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